Defeated

I'm feeling quite defeated tonight. I did my workout, same as Saturday's and I felt like I nearly died. I was able to download a podcast of the Couch to 5k so it would give me verbal voiceovers of the intervals so I knew when to run and when to walk without having to watch the clock. That helped quite a bit, but my legs felt like they were jello. I literally had to push myself to the limit in order to stay jogging when I was supposed to be jogging. Good news, I did it; I finished my workout just like I was supposed to.

I feel like I should be doing better than I am. While I'm completing the workout, I feel like I should be able to jog faster (I'm really trotting, I'm not sure I can count 4.7 mph as a jog even) and in turn going farther distances, but I can't. I'm also a bit depressed that this same workout on Saturday felt much easier then. I even took yesterday off completely, with no cross training. Also, this is my 4th week of this (going from completely inactive for months to working out at a minimum 3 days a week, but most weeks 5 days) and I've lost a whopping 3 pounds. I'm eating better, but the weight is just not coming off. For someone who's more than 20 pounds overweight, I should have dropped more than 3 fricking pounds! GRRRR!

There's a 2 mile fun run/walk in Albion on the 19th. A friend wants to do it, not sure I can. I was looking forward to it, but because of my commute and Shawn's busy schedule lately, all my training is on the treadmill. I know what going outside on the pavement is going to be like. HELL!

I need to find something positive to focus on the next couple days. I'm not sure what, but I need to find something quick.